Do Hard Things...

So I have been reading through the book Do Hard Things as I teach it to the youth at church. And it has some really awesome things in it. Today I was reading about complacency and rising above it. The strategies that were given for raising the bar were as follows:

1. Do what's hard for you
2. Be known for what you do, not for what you don't do.
3. Pursue Excellence, not excuses.

The premise is to not live the life that comes natural to you, but to live life outside of the box....

Wouldn't you know that during the middle of the chapter, "KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK..."

There is Dana, standing at my door. She asked me if I had things to make a smoothie...I told her I didn't have any milk and the only fruit I had frozen was strawberries...so her response was to go downstairs and get some milk for me in order for me to make her a strawberry smoothie...

I'm not going to even lie, I was frustrated.

While she was downstairs, Lucy came in. I welcomed her. She began to tell me that Dana had really taken advantage of her and had become really greedy, at one point even asking for all the things to make a cake...And basically she was warning me about Dana.

I began to think about what she was saying, I don't think I need a warning. I think I'm called to love. And I think Lucy is too.

Failed. Attempt.

This morning was the beginning of my finals. I was a nervous wreck, I stayed up until three in the morning studying and regretting my earlier cup of coffee. I wanted to give the first portion of my day to God, so I woke up at 7:30, to spend time with Him. It was during that time that I realized, Dana needs a friend and someone to be like Christ to her. Of course I knew that, but I didn't want to remember it, because I was getting frustrated.

So...I invited her to dinner. I told her to be here at 6:30p.m. and that we could watch a movie and eat dinner.

I arrived home early around 6 and began to prepare the dinner. Rosemary Chicken, twice baked potatoes, corn, and breadsticks were the menu for the night.

At 7:15 pm Dana showed up. I had just put in Remember the Titans to watch so she watched that as we waited on the food to finish. Right as I was putting dinner on the table, Linda walked in. I had only made enough for two so I offered her my plate, but she declined. So there we were the three of us watching the movie and eating. Dana requested more breadsticks so I made 2 more for she and her mom. When Linda got her breadstick, she decided it was time to leave. And after Dana got her final breadstick, she left as well. IN THE MIDDLE OF THE MOVIE.

I really didn't have a problem with that, I just thought it was odd. But you know what's sad...When I gave Dana her food and a fork and knife, she didn't know how to use the utensils. I saw her eat the grilled chicken with her fingers. She has never been taught etiquette, let alone how to use a fork and knife together.

Can we sit back for a moment and take in our blessings...

I live in a different world now.

Love is patient...

There is a minor reason why I haven't been writing. Well a couple reasons, really. One I have been out of town and two school has been really difficult, so it's taken longer....BUT those aren't the main reason.

The main reason is that I have been dealing with a lot of frustration with Dana. Recently, Dana, decided that she wanted more from me all the time. She has asked if I want to give her more of my movies, if I would make her more smoothies, give her orange juice(since I didn't make her a smoothie), and take her to Craighead Forest. She now comes up and just sits next to me, and I really can't talk because she usually comes up while I'm studying. This morning, she followed me to work out...

The thing is I know Dana has her issues. And because of that I'm trying not to get frustrated when I have seen her become kind of greedy with me.

But I have a question for all those who are reading this?

What is right? To draw a line and make sure she doesn't cross it OR to give her everything she wants? This is where the dissonance is taking place in my head. I truly want to be like Christ to my neighbors, but I'm not sure what that looks like with her. I do know it is out of my comfort zone.

But that's what I signed up for.

In other news, one of my neighbors to the right of me are super cool. He is an artist and she works in a pharmacy. I saw him last night at 1 in the morning sitting outside and playing the guitar. SO COOL!

Comment back, I want some feedback.

make some banana pancakes...and how about some smoothies while I'm at it.

I have some of the most fun times I have had in my apartment this week! I was able to make smoothie's for Dana and her Mom, I had a rocking out jam session with my friend, and had a Mexican feast with a dear friend from Texas.

I f ound out some interesting news! I'm about to introduce a new character, she is my neighbor to right, she and her boyfriend live there. They are the sweetest, and most normal of the people I have met in my apt complex. For the purposes of this blog I will call them Joseph and Stephanie. Joseph is an artist and I believe Stephanie is a nurse. Steph is one of those people who you want to get to know. She is sweet, always remembers my name, and continues to begin conversations with me. I really think we will be friends.

Well, Steph, Dana, my friend and I were all outside and I got talking about the lady who died in my apartment. There were telling me about the kind of person she was, nice but a drunk. They were telling stories about how she would go to her boyfriends house for days on end and come straggling home drunk and unable to walk. No one really knows what happened to her, but everyone assumes it was her drunkeness that ensued a fall, which caused her to hit her temple, which ended up killing her. All everyone knows is that she died. So we were talking about, and I told them that I was trying to get to the bottom of this. After talking Steph said, you know who her boyfriend is? I said that I didn't and she told me it was Ronnie! Lucy's SON! RANDOM! Man this story gets crazier everyday.

Today Dana came up and said, "I wish I could have another smoothie..." I told her I would make her one again soon, but that today I had to finish my work before I went to babysit....

Here's to finding out the truth about the previous occupant, more jam sessions, and smoothies.

can you do an ollie?

So today I had the precious experience of meeting 3 young girls around the age of ten. One was carrying a skate board. I was getting my mail, and the were chattering like young girls, and I noticed one of them peek around the corner and begin to stare at me. We said our hello's and I began to turn and leave. Then two more popped around the mailbox square where I was standing. I asked them all their names and if they knew how to ride the skateboard. All three claimed to be experts. I watched as one pushed the other out of the way grabbed the skateboard and prepared to show me her movies. And she got on it....then, she stayed on it....not rolling, in one place. I said, c'mon let me see an ollie. So the sister proceeded to go get the skateboard and she got on and a little ways down the path she said, I really can do an ollie, I just can't do it right now. So then another girl showed me how she could jump on it.

Before they left they asked where I lived and I told them, and I asked where they lived. She told me. They became pretty distraught as the oldest one began to tell me about my apartment. She said there was a sad story my apt, and I responded with, " about the lady who died? how did it happen?" She told me she hit her temple in the bathroom. Basically, I am on a mission to see if I can come to the truth about how this lady really did die, in my apartment, because it seems to me everyone has a different story. Interesting.

After hearing that invigorating story the two sisters of the group told me they were moving out Thursday, I asked why and they said they didn't know. Walking up the stairs, Danny stopped me and asked if I had met his friends(referring to the girls I was just talking about) I smiled and mentioned how sweet they were, and asked why they were moving. He began to tell me that, apparently they got kicked out of their apartment because they're dad started a fight or made a problem or something, so after two years of living here these 2 young girls will lose any stability they had in their life. It's so sad to me. These girls need someone to protect them, love them, and make them feel safe. To talk to them, ride a skateboard with them, and treat them as though they are princesses, and who will fight for them? The apartment complex won't, their dad won't, it should be us. People are getting missed in the shuffle, Lord make me someone who plucks people from that shuffle and moves them into Your path. It truly was a sad situation.

On a lighter note, I saw Ray today, he was play nerf guns with a 4 year old and got one stuck on a big trucks windshield. He asked me to get it off, but I couldn't reach it.

monotony.

Monotony- wearisome uniformity or lack of variety, as in occupation or scenery.

This is how I have never wanted to feel, but seem to feel as I begin living my life in my apartment. Everything seems so normal, but a new normal. My old normal used to look like hanging out with my parents, reading the bible, procrastinating on school work, watching movies, eating too much, and really not making a dent in the world. But my normal now is, sitting in my apartment, with one channel, learning to play my mandolin, reading my bible, finishing homework efficiently, working out, and having ongoing conversations with my neighbors. But can I tell you the truth, even though its new and probably more efficient, I am still not living out my calling.

MY NEIGHBORS NEED JESUS CHRIST, I am living in the middle of a mission field and I have an undying passion to change the world...or at least I say I do...but have I shared my faith yet? No, is it because I don't want to? Absolutely not! It's because I spend more time learning chords on the mandolin than I do talking to my neighbors and building relationships.

I am convinced passion is more than words.

I was watching a documentary the other day called "No Impact Man" it's about a guy who decided his beliefs were to go green and to make his ecological footprint smaller. Basically, he was married to recycling. And I don't honestly agree with his passions, he was a little overboard,in my opinion. He gradually began shutting off his electricity, never driving a car, making compost within his New York apt, becoming a vegetarian, never using plastic or paper sacks, making his child use cloth diapers, and the list seriously goes on and on, and though that's not my cause, I admire his passion.

He had values and beliefs that shaped his actions. And it caused a stir around the world. Within me I have the Spirit of the Living God, and my words say I'm passionate about it, but my actions don't always. This guy schooled me in turning my values into actions.

Dana, Lucy, and all my neighbors should know what I'm passionate about. This is my new goal.

Wherever you are reading this, I request you join with me in this "cause". When you turn your words into actions, radical change occurs.

Our world needs radical change, will sit back or join me in this fight?

To watch or not to watch: Power Rangers.

Sorry ladies and gentleman for the wait.

In the last week I have been to Little Rock, then to Tulsa, then back home...In the meantime, my place of work shut down. That taught me to never take a vacation ;) Just kidding. But that is the reason I haven't written, I have been gone, and stressed, and learning to trust God a little bit more.

Things are becoming more normal, like Peanut's loud barking and Dana's loud talking...I think I'm getting what I deserve for being a loud-talker. I have realized that, that Lucy must keep her grand-kids on some weekends, because every Saturday morning, a 9 year old boy or so, emerges from my her apartment and goes and gets the mail. I'm loving Saturday mornings at the apartment. Relaxing, peaceful, minus the barking (from both) of course, but a community feel, for sure.

Good news, I saw a person with a Christian T-Shirt holding a baby and walking with her husband. I have decided to find them, and be friends ;) Glimmers, yes, glimmers of hope.

So this morning, I opened my eyes after having a couple weirdo dreams, one about earthquakes(wonder why), and decided to have lunch at about 9:45 a.m. It consisted of Raisinetes and a turkey bacon sandwich. Don't judge me! Raisins are a fruit. I don't have cable but I get ABC. Turns out Saturday mornings they play Disney channel shows that I love...like I said don't judge ;)...so I began to watch and eat my sandwich and fruit, and my eyes got heavy, then I realized, Power Rangers was coming on next, and as enticing as it was, I decided to sleep...

What will this week hold? I don't know, but if Disney Shows are involved, I'm in.

My Friend.

I just thought I would share something that has touched me beyond anything I could ever have imagined.

Love is revolutionizing.

I was going to work out today and and I passed Dana while she was talking to someone, I waved and as I walked in to work out, I heard her say, "That's my friend, Emily."

I am truly the most blessed human being.

Who do you need to be a friend to today?

Peanut, go teetee!

I have noticed something that catches my eye as I secretly watch(stalk) my neighborhood. The mailboxes are like the office water cooler. As soon as the mail man comes, its like a swarm of people go out and wait for their mail, while he's putting it in. It's like what they wait for. I felt like the odd one not being down there. I thought it may be a one time occurrence, but this morning it happened again. Interesting.

So there is a ton of little stuff that I will never have time to write about, but I have a story today!

Dana has a dog. And I really think I should introduce him as a character. And I will use his real name, because it makes me laugh every time she talks to her dog. The dog's name is peanut buttercup. Between the hours of 9-10 am nearly every day, 2 or 3 times within the hour, Dana will take peanut out and begin to yell at him. "PEANUT, GO TEETEE. GO PEE! Go, I'm serious GO PEE, I don't care if you go on a car, just GO!"(I keep my car far from the curb) This interaction between Dana and her dog, really cracks me up. Today when she was doing it, I decided to talk to her the second time out.

I said hello, and within minutes Peanut was inside, and she was standing on my walkway talking to me. I ended up inviting her in and making her some hot chocolate. We talked about a lot of things. Turns out the lady who died in my apartment had drank too much alcohol and died in the bathtub. A little disturbing to say the least...

But there is something about my neighbors that I have known, but you should know too. These people are the ones that middle to upper class individuals don't give a rip about. My neighbors are the ones that no one notices. They aren't homeless so they are not at the forefront of peoples minds, but their lives have clearly been hard. A smile, and a cup of hot chocolate can really make a difference for any of them. For example today, while talking to Dana, she said hello to a person walking their dog, he looked a lot like me, he didn't look like his life was hard, he just looked like, a young man, probably single and working. Dana said hello to him, and he barely acknowledged her. I pray I am never that person, ever again. Because I have been.

So we continued our conversation. She asked me if I liked to read, and I told her I loved it. I asked her if she did, and she told me she couldn't read. I felt horrible. I asked if she knew her alphabet and letters, she said she only knew some. (Seriously, how blessed are you that you are reading this right now) I asked how she made it through high school she didn't give me a very clear answer, but I imagine she spent some time in special education classes. I offered to to teach her the alphabet song, and help her as much as I could.

Then she began to tell me about how much she loved Forrest Gump. She loves movies, she quotes them constantly. She asked if my DVD player was working, I said it was. Then she said something that I will never forget.

She said, "OH! Do you want me to go downstairs and get the Booty Call DVD?"

I chuckled to myself and told her that was not my type of movie.

The Journey Begins...

Within the last two weeks, I embarked on one of the most life changing and life altering events you can walk through. Moving out of my parents house!!! It was exciting, and a little frightening. But I was not about to tell my parents that.

Within days, I realized, this first apartment experience would be one I would I want to remember forever. I moved into a complex, that caused my socio-economic class to drop. Is this a bad thing? ABSOLUTELY NOT! Are my neighbors a little different? ABSOLUTELY! Here's the things, it's my nutty neighbors that inspired me to write this blog.

This blog will consist of the awkward, weird, fun, and Jesus filled conversations I will have with my neighbors, as well as anything else I decide to put in. But first let me tell you about the story that was the inspiration for this blog.

We'll start with the Characters: (all names will be changed...hopefully I don't screw up and put their real names)

Lucy- The neighbor to the left of me. In her late 60's. A no-nonsense, yet sweet woman.

Danny- Lucy's Son, probably in his 40's, smoker, gruff, but helpful. Lives with Lucy

Ronnie- Lucy's slightly older son who lives in the same complex, but not with Lucy. He has the same descriptions as Danny. They seriously could be twins.

Linda- Downstairs neighbor, you can tell she has a had a rough life. She is short, and missing a few teeth. She is in her early 60's

Dana- Linda's daughter, 36 years old. Possible victim of fetal alcohol syndrome.

Ray- a teen, mentally handicapped boy, with a sweet heart, who lives across the way.

So there are my neighbors, the characters(more, I'm sure, to come), to my ever increasing adventure.

This is where my story begins...

It was moving day, I was loading things in and out, trying to be as aloof as possible so no one would notice me, but that's hard when carrying massive loads of things up and down the stairs of an apartment building. My first contact was with Linda, she was just standing outside. I told her hello and kept going, she just watched me. I think that's what she likes to do, just watch, or as I would put it, stalking me with her eyes. I got moved in with a little help from Ronnie, and a massive amount of help from my amazing parents.

I was two days in to living on my own, around 10:30pm in when I was on the phone telling a friend what an awesome time I was having and how I wasn't scared at all. Then as abruptly as I said it, I heard at the door sound, "BANG, BANG, BANG!" I told my friend I would call her back. I asked who it was and I was surprised by the answer, " The police department."

Many things went through my head, some which I could mention, and some I couldn't. I wondered how they even knew I lived there, and why they would want me to open up. I was sure someone in my family had died. Which is scary, by the way. I opened up, and they said, "Is this where Ronnie lives?" Relieved, I pointed them to the right door. Through the course of the conversation, (because of course I was standing at the door listening) I heard the police question him on his whereabouts after leaving work, and I heard the police tell him basically, "watch it, because were watching you." What would make normal people worry and be scared, made me intrigued and giddy. (Hey, I never said I was normal.) It was at this moment I decided, a blog must be started!

My desire to start it increased today, in an interaction I had with Dana.

I was up early today to study for two midterms I had. After studying, I took my cup of coffee out on the walkway that my apartment complex likes to call a porch, and sat listened as, Dana, Linda, and Ray talked downstairs. It was early, around 7, just so you know, the three of them talk this early EVERYDAY. I just happened to be out there this morning, so they stared at me and I guess decided it would be polite to talk to me. I'm not sure I would agree, but I engaged in the conversation despite my feelings.

Ray was muttering things under his breath when Dana asked my name. I told her. " You live up there by yourself?" Once again I answered her. " How old are you?" Again, I told her. I thought I would keep my answers brief. (I was only 30 minutes into my cup of coffee, give me a break ;))I'm not comfortable telling people, especially strangers, my arrangements in living, but I went ahead and did it anyway. Dana, said that she would be up to visit me soon. I told she was welcome at anytime.

I got up to go inside and finish getting ready for school, and Linda came out. "You live up there?" She questioned. I confirmed. She continued, " O yeah, that's the apartment that the lady died in..."

Imagine hearing this. Your still paused and a little grossed out aren't you?

It was probably a good thing I had not taken a drink, because it would have been spewed. I went inside, a little weirded out, but not too weirded out. I immediately wrote down Blog: Lady Died in my apartment. I was brushing my teeth and getting ready to leave for school when I hear a knock at my door...(literally 2 min, after going in)

I open it, and there stands Dana for the first, of what I'm sure will be many visits...

LET THE FUN BEGINS...